I hate to mention age, but I come from an era when we weren't consumed by technology and television. My mother insisted that her children read. To describe my scarce leisure time in today's terms, I always default to reading.

I'm getting old, don't wear underwear, and I don't go to church.

Pickup's washed and you just got paid, with any luck at all you might even get laid.

This morning I shot six holes in my freezer. I think I've got cabin fever.

Elvis was the only man from Northeast Mississippi who could shake his hips and still be loved by rednecks, cops, and hippies.

I always said that I wouldn't use a teleprompter, and if I start to sing real flat, I'll hang it up.

While my mind is flexible, these brittle bones don't bend.