What people like are things to laugh at. Funny shows. It's all in the execution, the writing and the characters, not the setting. And the writing and the execution and the characters are GREAT on (Everybody Loves Raymond).

Houston Alexander is for real!

I really feel like it's a travesty to make a child famous. I really do.

I prefer older people to college kids [as audience] for the most part. I want people with life experience, people that understand where I'm coming from.

We live in a society that makes it really easy for these pussies to get by.

Most of my bits are long stream-of-consciousness- type things, and when I'm doing them onstage, other places to take the theme or idea will hit me, and I just go with it.

So instead of investing your time in a passion, you’ve sold your life to work for an uncaring machine that doesn’t understand you. That’s the problem with our society. And what’s the reward? Go home and get a big TV.