The most paradoxical aspect of neurotic shame is that it is the core motivator of the superachieved and the underachieved, the star and the scapegoat, the righteous and the wretched, the powerful and the pathetic.

To truly be committed to a life of honesty, love and discipline, we must be willing to commit ourselves to reality.

There are plenty of quacks in the field. Fewer than you'd expect, though still plenty (in alternative medicine).

I have never met an aggressive person who wasn’t a fearful person.

Healthy shame is an emotion that teaches us about our limits. Like all emotions, shame moves us to get our basic needs met.

We move from the illusion of certainty, to the certainty of illusion

Children need parents who model self-discipline rather than preach it. They learn from what their parents are actually willing to do; not from what they say they do.