A man will give up almost anything except his suffering.

Political correctness is a bit like a granny, a maiden aunt arriving at a party when everyone's having a good time. And she comes in, they all start sort of buttoning up and becoming self-conscious and behaving properly and then when she leaves, you can have fun again.

For me, the great problem growing up in England was that I had a very narrow concept of what God can be, and it was damn close to an old man with a beard.

The English contribution to world cuisine: the chip.

There's nothing good on the television; let's burn a witch. It must have been terribly exciting to live in those times.

Tension is wonderful for making people laugh.

It’s only on the brink that people find the will to change. Only at the precipice do we evolve.