The main evolutionary significance of humor is that it gets us from the closed mode to the open mode quicker than anything else.

I was a terrible dancer. I dance like an Englishman.

If you wish to kill yourself but lack the courage to, I think a visit to Palmerston North will do the trick.

Laughter is the best creative medicine.

My views are heretical to people who believe in political correctness.

If you want to know who your friends are, have a major failure.

My hovercraft is full of eels.