I don't like heroin, unless you're a jazz musician and then you have to be on it because jazz is the sound of heroin.

I can't complain about anything. It's like saying, "I don't like talkies." Time marches on and I don't care how people watch my movies as long as they see them. I don't care if they're on their phone. Believe me, if you ever want to watch my early films they would look a lot better on your phone than they would on a movie screen. The smaller the better.

I care about the presidential elections. I always vote. Sometimes I've voted more than once, illegally. But you can't anymore. The picture ID has ruined everything.

Going to a sensational murder trial is the only way I can relax.

I mean, what is prison, really, except a good bar without the liquor?

No matter what your sexual preference or gender, no one likes a man who is fussy about his looks. You can spend as much time as you want looking good. But don`t do it in public.

I'd love to sell out completely. It's just that nobody has been willing to buy.