Nothing brings closure to a campaign like opening it up again.

I thought we were out of money!? You can't simultaneously fire teachers AND tomahawk missiles.

Stephen Colbert is also then turned into news.

Wait a minute! Wait a minute! I figured this out. I know what's wrong with what we've done in Iraq. We've been following time as it goes forward. What a classic mistake. Linear time is so pre-9-11.

Don't censor yourself to comfort their ignorance.

Clearly, I'm way older than everyone.

The view... from my apartment... was the World Trade Center... and now it's gone, they attacked it. This symbol of American ingenuity, and strength, and labor, and imagination and commerce, and it is gone. But you know what? You know what the view is now? The Statue of Liberty. The view from the South of Manhattan is now the Statue of Liberty. You can't beat that!