If we are going to amend the constitution, shouldn't it be to keep the omos-hay from arrying-may?

Some people look at a glass and see it as half-full. Others look at a glass and call it a dragon.

It's funny how everyone hates witch hunts... until they see a witch.

To have not shot his friend in the face would have sent a message to the quail that America is weak.

I have complete faith in the continued absurdity of whatever’s going on.

It is hard to get mad at Donald Trump for saying stupid things, in the same way you don't get mad at a monkey when he throws poop at you at the zoo... What does get me angry is the ridiculous, disingenuous defending of the poop-throwing monkey.

You wonder sometimes how our government puts on its pants in the morning.