I thought we were out of money!? You can't simultaneously fire teachers AND tomahawk missiles.

Although to be fair, cherry picking isn't quite what we do. Cherries are sweet and delicious. What we do is more turd mining. And I'll thank you to give our work the respect it deserves!

The important thing is, that I guess I don't spend any time thinking about what I am or what we do means. I spend my time doing it.

Al-Qaeda's resurgence brings out the worst in the Bush Administration's math and logic.

Hopefully the process is to spot things that would be grist for the funny mill. In some respects, the heavier subjects are the ones that are most loaded with opportunity because they have the most - you know, the difference between potential and kinetic energy? - they have the most potential energy, so to delve into that gives you the largest combustion, the most interest. I don't mean for the audience. I mean for us. Everyone here is working too hard to do stuff we don't care about.

As an adolescent, Vonnegut made my life bearable.

One of the things that I do think government counts on is that people are busy. And it's very difficult to mobilize a busy and relatively affluent country, unless it's over really crucial- you know, foundational issues.