Prejudice is a house-plant which is very apt to wilt if you take it out-of-doors among folks.

There is no greater evidence of superior intelligence than to be surprised at nothing.

Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.

It AIN'T so much the things we don't know that get us into trouble. It's the things we know that just ain't so.

The highest philosophers, in explaining the mystery of this world, are obliged to call in the aid of another.

It's a wise man who profits by his own experience, but it's a good deal wiser one who lets the rattlesnake bite the other fellow.

When you do laugh, open your mouth wide enough for the noise to get out without squealing, throw your head back as though you were going to be shaved, hold on to your false hair with both hands and then laugh till your soul gets thoroughly rested.