I do not know of a better cure for sorrow than to pity somebody else.

There are only two qualities in the world: efficiency and inefficiency; and only two sorts of people: the efficient and the inefficient.

A WISE MAN never enjoys himself so much, or a FOOL so little, as when he is alone.

There are very few good judges of humor, and they don't agree.

If there was no faith there would be no living in this world. We could not even eat hash with any safety.

Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense.

There is no greater evidence of superior intelligence than to be surprised at nothing.