Fools carry their daggers in their open mouths.

The hardest thing any man can do is to fall down on the ice when it's slippery, and get up and praise the Lord.

Vanity is a strange passion; rather than be out of a job it will brag of its vices.

The happiest time in any man's life is when he is in red-hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it.

The greatest thief this world has ever produced is procrastination, and he is still at large.

The truly innocent are those who not only are guiltless themselves but who think others are.

Old maids sweeten their tea with scandal.