I haven't got as much money as some folks, but I've got as much impudence as any of them, and that's the next thing to money.

Beauty is a very handy thing to have, especially for a woman who ain't handsome.

And now the lads and lasses, following the example of the birds, bill and coo together.

The morning paper is just as necessary for an American as dew is to the grass.

Rumor is a vagrant without a home, and lives upon what it can pick up.

Rivalry and envy are Siamese twins.

Keep a cow, and then the milk won't have to be watered but once.