The quickest way to take the starch out of someone who is always blaming himself is to agree with him.
You can reach stupidity only with a cannon ball.
Keep a cow, and then the milk won't have to be watered but once.
Lying is like trying to hide in a fog: If you move about you're in danger of bumping your head against the truth, and as soon as the fog blows off, you are gone anyhow.
Advice is like kissing: it costs nothing and is a pleasant thing to do.
About the only difference between the poor and the rich, is this, the poor suffer misery, while the rich have to enjoy it.