I used to think the only use for sport was to give small boys something else to kick besides me.

Have you ever taken anything out of the clothes basket because it had become, relatively, the cleaner thing?

When it comes to housework the one thing no book of household management can ever tell you is how to begin. Or maybe I mean why.

I blame Rousseau, myself. "Man is born free", indeed. Man is not born free, he is born attached to his mother by a cord and is not capable of looking after himself for at least seven years (seventy in some cases).

Any committee that is the slightest use is composed of people who are too busy to want to sit on it for a second longer than they have to.

Perennials are the ones that grow like weeds, biennials are the ones that die this year instead of next and hardy annuals are the ones that never come up at all.

It might be marvelous to be a man - then I could stop worrying about what's fair to women and just cheerfully assume I was superior, and that they had all been born to iron my shirts. Better still, I could be an Irish man - then I would have all the privileges of being male without giving up the right to be wayward, temperamental and an appealing minority.