Comedy's about opening up and being unique, but to a point where the audience can relate to what you're saying.

What you find I think in the mystical strain of Catholicism is that you're put in relationship with God, and you have many opportunities not only of talking with God in petitionary prayer, but also of listening to God, being attentive to God, as happens in contemplation.

I love to pop up at the movie theaters. I love to treat the people who are there.

I don't like to hear woman argue...it makes my balls itch.

My kids are the funniest two human beings there are.

I can get where some scientists would say comedians are crazy. What you have to understand: A lot of comedians are dealing with a dark passion. A lot of these are guys coming from a tumultuous life, including myself. Some people need outlets, a way to express yourself.

Going through my divorce has changed who I am in my understanding of what's good and bad in relationships.