Every time you make a decision, you mess with someone's life.

There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap.

Imagine what I could have done in ten years. I could have learned to speak Japanese. I could have played every RPG video game ever created, and if I spoke Japanese I could have played the foreign ones too! Man, I could have built a spaceship in my backyard and flew it to the moon and back, if I wanted.

Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants.

Nobody actually ever does this—escaping through a window.

For some reason and I don't know why, but I don't think that I'm funny in California. So I always want to do my movies east somewhere.

Back in '93 I saw my first UFC fight and just became enamored by it then.