I sometimes feel that more lousy dishes are presented under the banner of pate than any other.

One of the great benefits of organised religion is that you can be forgiven your sins, which must be a wonderful thing. I mean, I carry my sins around with me, there's nobody there to forgive them.

The rewards for being sane may not be very many, but knowing what's funny is one of them.

Sex is a momentary itch, love never lets you go.

He who truly believes he has a hangover has no hangover.

I was never an Angry Young Man. I am angry only when I hit my thumb with a hammer.

Laziness has become the chief characteristic of journalism, displacing incompetence.