Most people, of course, spend their lives caring about the wrong things. The worry about South Africa or Nicaragua. They spend so much time finding themselves that they lose their taxicabs. They don't see that what kind of napkin you get at a delicatessen is a matter of much significance in the world today. That's why they don't get linen.

I'm going to lower the drinking age to eighteen. If you're old enough to die in Iraq, you're old enough to drink.

I want to be governor [of Texas] because I need the closet space.

But the most dangerous thing in the world in the world is to run the risk of waking up one morning and realizing suddenly that all this time you've been living without really and truly living and by then it's too late. When you wake up to that kind of realization, it's too late for wishes and regrets. It's even too late to dream.

People may surprise you with unexpected kindness. Dogs have a depth of loyalty that often we seem unworthy of. But the love of a cat is a blessing, a privilege in this world.

If Raymond Chandler came from the South, his name would be Ace Atkins.

If you're paranoid long enough, sooner or later you're gonna be right.