Most people, of course, spend their lives caring about the wrong things. The worry about South Africa or Nicaragua. They spend so much time finding themselves that they lose their taxicabs. They don't see that what kind of napkin you get at a delicatessen is a matter of much significance in the world today. That's why they don't get linen.

We've had to be creative to get on the ballot.

Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled around the countryside irritating people.

We're going to make that Lone Star shine again.

The distance between the limousine and the gutter is a short one.

How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design?

Seventeen publishers rejected the manuscript, at which time we knew we had something pretty hot.