One does not have humor. It has you.

Marriage isn't all that it's cracked up to be, let me tell you. Honestly. Marriage is probably the chief cause of divorce.

Most jokes state a bitter truth.

I am on sort of a diet in terms of the Internet. It's the sheer quantity. It's the Niagara of opinion, of information. It's not that I have any kind of compassion fatigue. I just insist on having a life.

Marriage is probably the chief cause of divorce.

I think the greatest imagination we can exercise is one that imagines how someone else feels. Because you know how you feel, but so often we attribute our own feelings on to someone else.

Today's audience knows more about what's on television than what's in life.