I'd make people say 'use Fork;' if I thought I could get away with it.
Lisp has all the visual appeal of oatmeal with fingernail clippings mixed in.
Unix is like a toll road on which you have to stop every 50 feet to pay another nickel. But hey! You only feel 5 cents poorer each time.
The computer should be doing the hard work. That's what it's paid to do, after all.
Would you trust the linguistic intuitions of someone who has been studying Latin or Greek for three days?
I think I'm likely to be certified before Perl is.