Perl is designed to give you several ways to do anything, so consider picking the most readable one.

Most of you are familiar with the virtues of a programmer. There are three, of course: laziness, impatience, and hubris.

Perl doesn't have an infatuation with enforced privacy. It would prefer that you stayed out of its living room because you weren't invited, not because it has a shotgun

[Perl] gives you the STDERR filehandle so that your program can make snide comments off to the side while it transforms (or attempts to transform) your input into your output.

I try not to confuse roles and traits in my own life. Being the Perl god is a role. Being a stubborn cuss is a trait.

You need to go and find someone to teach you the rudiments of irrational discourse.

The computer should be doing the hard work. That's what it's paid to do, after all.