I think I'm likely to be certified before Perl is.

I'm sorry, but you just made me lose my sense of humor, which is deeply regrettable.

Well, coffee is my drug of choice, generally, with a little bit of Pepsi here and there, if I need more sugar. But yeah, if I could do intravenous coffee, I would. But I guess that's pretty standard.

Natural languages generally are not designed by humans, they're just designed by the participants and you say something new and somebody else says, "Oh, that's a cool way to say it," and the next thing you know, everyone is saying it because it's shiny.

You want it in one line? Does it have to fit in 80 columns?

Human languages tend to be much more ambiguous than computer languages because humans are much smarter about interpreting the context.

Must be a different Larry Wall. There are at least 137 of us in the U.S.