I can't think of anything worse after a night of drinking than waking up next to someone and not being able to remember their name, or how you met, or why they're dead.

I get asked to do benefits a lot and I've decided I've got to be a bit more discerning, I can't just do all of them. . . . I got asked to do a benefit for babies born addicted to crack. And I said well, all right, I'll help you raise money for them, but I think we both know what they're gonna spend it on.

[On living in New York City:] I'm oblivious to everything. I just don't notice anything. I sat in a coffee shop, drank half a cup of coffee before I noticed there was lipstick on the cup. There was wadded-up gum and lipstick on the napkin. I must have been sitting on that woman's lap for an hour.

I want to be so famous that drag queens will dress like me in parades when I'm dead.

It goes Christmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day. Is that fair to anyone who's alone? These are all days you gotta be with someone. And if you didn't get around to killing yourself at Christmas or New Year's, boom! There's Valentine's Day. I think there should be one more after Valentine's Day just called, 'Who could love you?'

I have a rule, and that is to never look at somebody's face while we're having sex; because, number one, what if I know the guy?

We've all made mistakes that are similar in just trying to get by or make some money or feel good about ourselves.