As the farmer said, "I'm not greedy, all I want is the land next to mine.

He laughs best whose laugh lasts.

When you see yourself quoted in print and you’re sorry you said it, it suddenly becomes a misquotation.

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.

Before publishers' blurbs were invented, authors had to make their reputations by writing.

If we lacked imagination enough to foresee something better, life would indeed be a tragedy.

A censor is an expert in cutting remarks. A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.