There are two kinds of failures: those who thought and never did, and those who did and never thought

If at first you don't succeed, lie, lie again.

Computers can solve all kinds of problems except the unemployment problem they create.

Everyone is in awe of the lion tamer in a cage with half a dozen lions-everyone but a school bus driver.

Many an optimist has become rich simply by buying out a pessimist.

Every man serves a useful purpose: a miser, for example, makes a wonderful ancestor.

The devil could change. He was once an angel and may be evolving still.