Don't worry about middle age: you'll outgrow it.

Incompetence plus incompetence equals incompetence.

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings.

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.

Before publishers' blurbs were invented, authors had to make their reputations by writing.

Men now monopolize the upper levels... depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence.

A philosopher is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat that isn't there. A theologian is the man who finds it.