When shopping at Dunkin' Donuts, pretend you are the mother of nine. Say things like, 'Little David likes cream-filled and Susie wanted jelly.' That way, no one will be suspicious when you order a dozen donuts with one cup of coffee to go.

Major fluctuations in weight gain and loss are detrimental to your health and embarrassing to explain to your friends and family.

Almost everything can be construed as sexual harassment depending upon the way it is said. One general rule of thumb is to think of your female co-workers as you would your sister. Yes, she is a woman. No, she is not a sexual object. Yes, your parents probably like her more than they like you.

Single people slip out of the dating market for many social, economic, psychological, and ideological reasons including marriage, illness, bankruptcy, job promotion, exhaustion, and common sense. Inevitably, however, they return because of divorce, boredom, loneliness, and memory loss.

More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you've been bad and good.

every one of us possesses a gene predisposing us toward rivalry, competition, and fits of envy with any past, present, or future siblings.

Tip the world over and everything loose falls into L.A.