Sadness is poetic. You're lucky to live sad moments. When you let yourself be sad, your body has antibodies. It has happiness that comes rushing in to meet the sadness.

What we've done with our modern food supply is absolute insanity. It's not even real any more. You used to be able to give a kid an apple and they would love it. Kids can't even taste apples any more. Apples taste like paper to kids now.

People get successful and they start saying, 'Well of course I am! I was chosen! I'm special!' No, you're not.

I've met a lot of people who've lost their jobs and they still have a sense of humor.

Spend time with your kids and have your own ideas about what they need. It won't take away your manhood; it will give it to you.

My bank is the worst. They are screwing me. You know what they did to me? They're charging me money for not having enough money. Apparently, when you're broke, that costs money.

I don't stop eating when I'm full. The meal isn't over when I'm full. It's over when I hate myself.