"Not being virulently and overtly racist against black people" and "treating gay people like human beings" are necessary conditions of greatness.
Mallory OrtbergEnjoy your relationship with your boyfriend and don't worry about the people or situations you dream about. Once you wake up, they're over; let them go.
Mallory OrtbergIf youโre so forgetful that youโre incapable of remembering that a co-worker isnโt pregnant on three separate occasions in as many months, I worry about your memory and cognition skills.
Mallory Ortberg