Really, what we want now, is not laws against crime, but a law against insanity. That is where the true evil lies.

Seasickness: at first you are so sick you are afraid you will die, and then you are so sick you are afraid you won't die.

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.

Do not undervalue the headache. While it is at its sharpest it seems a bad investment; but when relief begins, the unexpired remainder is worth $4 a minute.

Barring that natural expression of villainy which we all have, the man looked honest enough.

If we were meant to talk more than listen, we would have two mouths and one ear.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.