Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

In religion and politics, people's belief's and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second hand, and without examination

The pause - that impressive silence, that eloquent silence, that geometrically progressive silence which often achieves a desired effect where no combination of words, howsoever felicitous, could accomplish it.

The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.

Doesn't make any difference who we are or what we are, there's always somebody to look down on.

Give an Irishman lager for a month and he's a dead man. An Irishman's stomach is lined with copper, and the beer corrodes it. But whiskey polishes the copper and is the saving of him.

Women cannot receive even the most palpably judicious suggestion without arguing it; that is, married women.