Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.

It takes a heap of sense to write good nonsense

All Congresses and Parliaments have a kindly feeling for idiots, and a compassion for them, on account of personal experience and heredity.

Eloquence is the essential thing in a speech, not information.

Tell the truth or trump-but get the trick.

Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

Use the right word, not its second cousin.