Eight grown Americans out of ten dread the coming of the Fourth, with its pandemonium and its perils, and they rejoice when it is gone-if still alive.

I've never let my school interfere with my education.

The symbol of the race ought to be a human being carrying an ax, for every human being has one concealed about him somewhere, and is always seeking the opportunity to grind it.

The New York papers have long known that no large question is ever really settled until I have been consulted.

April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.

No one can tell me what is a good cigar--for me. I am the only judge... There are no standards--no real standards. Each man's preference is the only standard for him, the only one which he can accept, the only one which can command him.

Well enough for old folks to rise early, because they have done so many mean things all their lives they can't sleep anyhow.