What do you think of the human mind? I mean, in case you think there is a human mind.

The jury system puts a ban upon intelligence and honesty and a premium upon ignorance, stupidity and perjury.

... No photograph ever was good, yet, of anybody - hunger and thirst and utter wretchedness overtake the outlaw who invented it! It transforms into desperadoes the weakest of men; depicts sinless innocence upon the pictured faces of ruffians; gives the wise man the stupid leer of a fool, and the fool an expression of more than earthly wisdom.

What is the chief end of man?-to get rich. In what way?-dishonestly if we can; honestly if we must.

There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind-the humorous.

Teaching is like trying to hold 35 corks underwater at once.

They say that you can't live by bread alone, but I can live on compliments.