Virtue has never been as respectable as money.

Out of the public schools comes the greatness of the nation.

A mighty porterhouse steak an inch and a half thick, hot and sputtering from the griddle; dusted with fragrant pepper; enriched with little melting bits of butter of the most impeachable freshness and genuineness; the precious juices of the meat trickling out and joining the gravy, archipelagoed with mushrooms; a township or two of tender, yellowish fat gracing an out-lying district of this ample county of beefsteak; the long white bone which divides the sirloin from the tenderloin still in its place.

Humor must be one of the chief attributes of God. Plants and animals that are distinctly humorous in form and characteristics are God's jokes.

The difference between those that succeed and those that fail is, those that succeeded tried.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

The [Kodak is] the only witness I have encountered in my long experience that I couldn't bribe.