Humor is like a frog; if you dissect it, it dies.

Nothing helps scenery like bacon and eggs.

Agassiz does recommend authors to eat fish, because the phosphorus in it makes brains. But I cannot help you to a decision about the amount you need to eat. Perhaps a couple of whales would be enough.

Simple rules for saving money: To save half, when you are fired by an eager impulse to contribute to a charity, wait and count to forty. To save three quarters, count sixty. To save all, count sixty-five.

I am only human, although I regret it.

Some things you can't find out; but you will never know you can't by guessing and supposing: no, you have to be patient and go on experimenting until you find out that you can't find out.

The Autocrat of Russia possesses more power than any other man in the earth; but he cannot stop a sneeze.