A lie can make it half way around the world before the truth has time to put its boots on.

The business aspects of the Fourth of July is not perfect as it stands. See what it costs us every year with loss of life, the crippling of thousands with its fireworks, and the burning down of property. It is not only sacred to patriotism and universal freedom, but to the surgeon, the undertaker, the insurance offices - and they are working it for all it is worth.

A "classic" is a book that everybody praises but nobody has read

I like a good story well told. That is the reason I am sometimes forced to tell them myself.

Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else. This is not advice, it is merely custom.

How little a thing can make us happy when we feel that we have earned it.

Adam was not alone in the Garden of Eden, however, and does not deserve all the credit; much is due to Eve, the first woman, and Satan, the first consultant.