When the human race has once acquired a superstition, nothing short of death is ever likely to remove it.

Too bad that youth is wasted on the young.

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.

Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.

No throne exists that has a right to exist, and no symbol of it, flying from any flagstaff, is righteously entitled to wear any device but the skull and crossbones of that kindred industry which differs from royalty only businesswise-merely as retail differs from wholesale.

The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference between a mermaid and a seal.

Enthusiasm is caught, not taught.