The church is always trying to get other people to reform, it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little, by way of example

You can't keep a juvenile moral institution alive on two displays of its sash per year.

It takes some little time to accept and realize the fact that while you have been growing old, your friends have not been standing still, in that matter.

Do one thing every day you don't want to do.

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish.

Man - a figment of God's imagination.

No one can tell me what is a good cigar--for me. I am the only judge... There are no standards--no real standards. Each man's preference is the only standard for him, the only one which he can accept, the only one which can command him.