I was dead for millions of years before I was born and it never inconvenienced me a bit.

Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.

When the human race has once acquired a superstition, nothing short of death is ever likely to remove it.

I am content to be a bric-a-bracker and a Ceramiker.

Humor must be one of the chief attributes of God. Plants and animals that are distinctly humorous in form and characteristics are God's jokes.

My heart goes out to anyone who is making his first appearance before an audience of human beings.

It was in Warwick Castle that I came across the curious stranger whom I am going to talk about. He attracted me by three things: his candid simplicity, his marvelous familiarity with ancient armor, and the restfulness of his company--for he did all the talking.