Humor is tragedy plus time.

...the administration of the law can never go lax where every individual sees to it that it grows not lax in his own case, or in cases which fall under his eyes.

There warn't anybody at the church, except maybe a hog or two, for there warn't any lock on the door, and hogs likes a puncheon floor in summer-time because it's cool. If you notice, most folks don't go to church only when they've got to; but a hog is different.

Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.

Cold! If the thermometer had been an inch longer we'd all have frozen to death!

It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.

Whenever a copyright law is to be made or altered, then the idiots assemble.