I played Chess with him and would have beaten him sometimes only he always took back his last move, and ran the game out differently

You can go to heaven if you want. I'd rather stay in Bermuda.

If you have no will to change it, you have no right to criticize it.

Civilization is a limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation.

They do say that when a man starts down hill everybody is ready to help him with a kick, and I suppose it is so.

Be good and you'll be lonesome