Preachers are always pleasant company when they are off duty.

No one is willing to acknowledge a fault in himself when a more agreeable motive can be found for the estrangement of his acquaintances.

What a curious kind of fool a girl is. Never been licked in school. What's a licking?

Being rich ain't what it's cracked up to be. It's just worry and worry, and sweat and sweat, and a-wishing you was dead all the time.

Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'

Some of us cannot be optimists, but all of us can be bigamists

To my mind that literature is best and most enduring which is characterized by a noble simplicity.