It is not best to use our morals weekdays, it gets them out of repair for Sunday.

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.

In my nostrils still lives the breath of flowers that perished twenty years ago.

Next you'd see a raft sliding by, away off yonder, and maybe a galoot on it chopping. . . you'd see the ax flash and come down-you don't hear nothing; you see the ax go up again, and by the time it's above the man's head then you hear the k'chunk!-it had took all that time to come over the water.

My memory was never loaded with anything but blank cartridges.

Never argue with people who buy ink by the gallon.

The perfection of wisdom, and the end of true philosophy is to proportion our wants to our possessions, our ambitions to our capacities, we will then be a happy and a virtuous people.