None of us can have as many virtues as the fountain-pen, or half its cussedness; but we can try.

When the human race has once acquired a superstition, nothing short of death is ever likely to remove it.

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream.

Man is the only animal that is cruel. It kills just for the sake of it.

A distinguished man should be as particular about his last words as he is about his last breath. He should write them out on a slip of paper and take the judgment of his friends on them. He should never leave such a thing to the last hour of his life, and trust to an intellectual spurt at the last moment to enable him to say something smart with his latest gasp and launch into eternity with grandeur.

The public is the only critic whose judgment is worth anything at all.

The art of prophecy is very difficult, especially with respect to the future.