If there was two birds sitting on a fence, he would bet you which one would fly first.

There are two reasons why anybody buys anything. The real reason, and the reason they give you.

Truth is stranger than fiction-to some people, but I am measurably familiar with it.

That is the way of the scientist. He will spend thirty years in building up a mountain range of facts with the intent to prove a certain theory; then he is so happy with his achievement that as a rule he overlooks the main chief fact of all-that all his accumulation proves an entirely different thing.

Some authorities hold that the young ought not to lie at all. That, of course, is putting it rather stronger than necessary; still, while I cannot go quite so far as that, I do maintain, and I believe I am right, that the young ought to be temperate in the use of this great art until practice and experience shall give them that confidence, elegance and precision which alone can make the accomplishment graceful and profitable.

My father was an amazing man. The older I got, the smarter he got.

Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do. Play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do.