Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.

The equator was wisely put where it is, because if it had been run through Europe all the kings would have tried to grab it.

We don't care to eat toadstools that think they are truffles.

The choir always tittered and whispered all through the service. There was once a church choir that was not ill-bred, but I have forgotten where it was.

Never learn to do anything: if you don't learn, you'll always find someone else to do it for you.

All publishers are Columbuses. The successful author is their America. The reflection that they-like Columbus-didn't discover what they expected to discover, and didn't discover what they started out to discover, doesn't trouble them. All they remember is that they discovered America; they forget that they started out to discover some patch or corner of India.

Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.