NVC is language, thoughts, communication skills and means of influence that serve my desire to do three things: 1) to liberate myself from cultural learning that is in conflict with how I want to live my life. 2) to empower myself to connect with myself and others in a way that makes compassionate giving natural. 3) to empower myself to create structures that support compassionate giving.

We are never angry because of what others say or do. It is our thinking that makes us angry.

All people ever say is: THANK YOU (a celebration of life) and PLEASE (an opportunity to make life more wonderful).

If we become skilled in giving ourselves empathy, we often experience in just a few seconds a natural release of energy which then enables us to be present with the other person. If this fails to happen, however, we have a couple of other choices.

When you need empathy, you cannot give empathy.

Focusing on the unmet need (not the judgment) is more likely to get the need met.

Clinical training in psychoanalysis has a deficit. It teaches how to sit and think about what a person is saying and how to interpret it intellectually, but not how to be fully present to this person.