I walked in on my folks doing it doggy style less than four hours ago." "Waitress!" Jonas screamed, clicking his fingers madly. "Bring two!" then, more quietly,"You want a neck massage? A bedtime story? A bullet in the ear?

The vampire bible, bound in human skin, written in blood, and full of prophecies that were never wrong. Trouble was, if you read the thing too long, it drove you nuts. Not "I'm having a bad day and feel bitchy" nuts or PMS nuts. "I think I'll commit felony assault on my friends and rape my boyfriend" nuts.

Also,I loathe it when you refer to me as dude" Eric Sinclair to Betsy

Wow, girlfriend, you're incompatible with life! And here I thought I was just incompatible with pink.

They weren't moving. Perhaps I was dazzling then with my ineptitude. It had happened before.

We have souls. Sure we do. Otherwise we'd do bad things all the time. You know, like politicians.

Has anyone ever told you that you lack focus?